damn you, you took mine!

here are a couple i know:
"your body's like a visa card, cuz it's everywhere i want to be."
"Hi, I'm Fred Flintstone, and I can make your bed rock."

Oooh kudos to you Bob. I'm gonna use that one sometime lol

"Are you on medication? Wanna operate my heavy machinery?"

"Are your parents terrorists? Cause you're the bomb!!!"(gay i know)
"Baby your feet must be tired, cause you've been running through my mind all day!!"
"Is your father a thief? Cause I want to know who stole the stars from the sky and put them in eyes."
and my favorite...
"Hey baby! Ever have your ass licked by a fat guy in an overcoat?"(Jay and Silent Bob)

how bout "hi, my cars faster than yours" ?

Damnit, no wonder im single lol stupid male egos :P

watched Night at the Roxbury a few too many times didnt you?

:funny:

funny movie!

My magical watch says you aren't wearing any panties. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!

By the way the light is hitting your eyes, I can see myself in them, and damn, I look good!

Are you a farmer? No, 'cuz you sure know how to raise a ****.

Guess what?! I've got an 8" tounge and I can breath out of my ears!

Is that a run in your stockings, or is it the stairway to heaven?

Excuse me, but does my tongue taste funny to you?

Do you have rubbers at your house or should I pull out?

Gee, for a fat girl you sure don’t sweat much.

Hi, I've been undressing you with my eyes all night long, and think it's time to see if I'm right.

Hi. You'll do.

If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?

I've just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot.

Wait until the end of the evening when everything is real hazy and alcohol soaked, walk up to someone you've never met and say, "Come on, we're leaving." (The key is to act like you know them.)

What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? Â*My Zipper

Would you like to dance or should I go **** myself again?

You see my friend over there? [Point to friend who sheepishly waves from afar] He wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.

You're ugly but you intrigue me.




some of them are funny as hell and some are just plain odd. :lol:

those two are awesome lol

Found on my little brother's favorite t-shirt:

"I'm shy, but I have a big dick!"

- Justin

nice butt, get in the truck

so, u ever been penetrated??(works only on lesbians)

never been with a spanish chic before...OLE!!(works only on spanish chics, obviously)

Do you have any italian(or any other nationality) in u?
if answer is no, reply with- do u want some?
if answer is yes, reply with- would u like about (insert penis size in inches here) more?

do u have a quarter, i promised my mom i'd call when i found true love.

do u believe in love at first site, or should i walk by again?

the Shaft pickup line...
It is my duty to please that booty.

and finally...
Hi ladies, my name is Steven Stiffler and I have a 12 inch penis...AROUND! Think about it...

i dont know if this is a repost but:

Are you a parking ticket? cause you got FINE FINE FINE written all over you.

one more:

i lost my number... can i have yours?

That reminds me of

I'm lost, please take me home with you

"If I were a dinosaur, I'd be a lickalotapuss"

"If I were a dinosaur, I'd be a humpyersoreass"

lol never hears those two before :lol:

i'm liking the dinosaur ones! :lol:

"I like peanut butter. Wanna *****??"

or

Your dress looks nice. It would look a lot nicer crumpled up on my floor though.

check it out... best pickup line that works hands down every time and will start **** up is:

ask one of your buddy's when you go to a bar if he thinks the girl over at the bar is cute. Hell say yeah and you say ill go and talk to her for you. then you go over to the girl and say "hey my buddy over there wants to know if you think im cute" shell look over at him smiling and hell wave... your in.

if that doesnt work try one of the following:

"I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you."

"I don't normally do this, but I felt compelled to tell you something. You have an absolutely breath-taking... heiney. I mean, that thing's good. I wanna be friends with it."

"Hey, wanna know what the best part about getting really drunk and having sex with me is? Either way, you won't remember it tomorrow so who cares."

I've used this with mixed results.


"I just ate a pineapple, wanna blow me?"

Jake, make sure to give the girl you try this on the picture that is in your avatar!

"Hi, can I smell your gum??" :lol:

hi. it was sour apple. and it smelled good :lol: