funny
 

After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.

By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to: straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

:rofl: HAHAHAHAHAHA :rofl: especially like the last two:rofl:

That's no midget.....it's Fidget!

- Justin

fidget is undercover for FedEx and trying to sabotage UPS!!!

"Live bugs on back-order" LOL That list is great.

That's great!!!!!!!

Hehe. I love those. Every time I've seen it before it's supposed to be Qantas not UPS, though. Still funny.

lol

:stupid:

i lol'ed

Yeah, I've seen it as Qantas as well, and still funny.

funny, but not real !

lmao! i'm a super at UPS. those comments are in no way, shape, or form out of the realm of possibility of being true. we have 125 package cars in our building and every night it's the same deal, driver writes down what's wrong, mechanics reply. there's always smartass comments on their sheets. they're all f*ckin crazy...too much deisel in the brain.

those r great, gonna hang it up at work ...printing....