Koll
10-04-2005, 06:57 PM
So I caught a bit of a flu or cold in the last few days, nothing big right? Standard drink lots of fluids, eat some decent food, take some vitamins, voila everything will be ok
Boy was I mistaken, yesterday I awoke to the most horrible wretched sore throat, the kind that emits an odor you can smell over your own bad morning breath. The stench of rotten bacterial growth smothering your tonsils. Not to mention, the thick layer of yellow-green blood infused phlegm I was gagging up all day. Boy oh boy was that fun! My throat was raw bleeding and stinky, my head spinning, and my body aching all over.
I gargled with salt water and listerine for the last two days - you know how that should sting right, well my throat is so ****ing gone I can't feel a thing. I can stick my fingers back there and play with the little ballsac (:drool.
Wake up this morning, eat a banana, go to school. As I get off the bus at the dorm area, I suddenly perceive this intense urgency to take a ****. No problem, I haven't ****ted in over a day. I waddle my way into the bathroom and proceed to let rip the ****ing WIDEST PIECE OF **** I HAVE EVER TAKEN. It must have been at LEAST 3+ inches wide and 6 inches long, it came out like a miniature septic smeared football. My anus reels back and puckers up in excruciating pain from the small land mass it just deposited in this public toilet.
After about 30 seconds, the wave of pain fleshed out and I was ok. Then it happened. I couldn't even believe it was happening. I had absolutely no control over it; it was as if someone opened the faucet full blast and just let it keep running. A thick hot stream of liquid gold came rushing out of my anus splattering the toilet walls, ricocheting back up to my bare ass, and it kept going for a solid 20 seconds. The sensation of the slick milkshake **** exiting my football-torn ******* at escape velocity was horrifying. I just beared down and took it like a lactose intolerant little boy who ate too much ice cream.
Now its been happening to me all day, spurt after spurt of liquid hell seeping from my anus. I'm afraid to be anywhere more than 30 seconds from a toilet. Sweet jesus what was my sin, I repent just stop the ****
Boy was I mistaken, yesterday I awoke to the most horrible wretched sore throat, the kind that emits an odor you can smell over your own bad morning breath. The stench of rotten bacterial growth smothering your tonsils. Not to mention, the thick layer of yellow-green blood infused phlegm I was gagging up all day. Boy oh boy was that fun! My throat was raw bleeding and stinky, my head spinning, and my body aching all over.
I gargled with salt water and listerine for the last two days - you know how that should sting right, well my throat is so ****ing gone I can't feel a thing. I can stick my fingers back there and play with the little ballsac (:drool.
Wake up this morning, eat a banana, go to school. As I get off the bus at the dorm area, I suddenly perceive this intense urgency to take a ****. No problem, I haven't ****ted in over a day. I waddle my way into the bathroom and proceed to let rip the ****ing WIDEST PIECE OF **** I HAVE EVER TAKEN. It must have been at LEAST 3+ inches wide and 6 inches long, it came out like a miniature septic smeared football. My anus reels back and puckers up in excruciating pain from the small land mass it just deposited in this public toilet.
After about 30 seconds, the wave of pain fleshed out and I was ok. Then it happened. I couldn't even believe it was happening. I had absolutely no control over it; it was as if someone opened the faucet full blast and just let it keep running. A thick hot stream of liquid gold came rushing out of my anus splattering the toilet walls, ricocheting back up to my bare ass, and it kept going for a solid 20 seconds. The sensation of the slick milkshake **** exiting my football-torn ******* at escape velocity was horrifying. I just beared down and took it like a lactose intolerant little boy who ate too much ice cream.
Now its been happening to me all day, spurt after spurt of liquid hell seeping from my anus. I'm afraid to be anywhere more than 30 seconds from a toilet. Sweet jesus what was my sin, I repent just stop the ****