My woman kicked my ass last night

[12secondv6]

So, as you all know, I am an angel.

Halo over my head all the time, I help old people cross the street, I help small fury animals when they are in need, I make brownies for my neighbors.

Well, yesterday I was tired (worked on the lawn the whol day w/ the woman) and I fell asleep around 10????

And.... genie was awake AFTER 10?!?!?! That alone is shocking and makes you wonder right?

Well, as I am peacefully sleeping and dreaming of world peace I dreamt that someone punched me on the left side of the face!

Little did I know, the woman decided to run from one side of the house, leap into the room, fly through the air, extend one fist and POW! She punched me in the face!

I woke up this morning and mentioned to her that my face hurts on the left side. Her side of the story is that she was watching tv and heard a big loud bang come from the bed room???? She claims I did it to myself??

She has not realized yet, I have ninja like reflexes and am always aware of my surroundings 24 hours a day.... even when sleeping.. cause we ALL know ninja's don't sleep!

So, now I look at my face in the mirror and I have a red mark under my left eye and it hurts!

Is there a phone # for battered boy friends????

[Untamed]

This thread sucks. Go be cute somewhere else.

[Dark_Knight7096]

Your woman didn't do anything. That lound bang she heard was a sonic boom from Chuck Norris' foot as he roundhouse kicked you in the face preemptively so he wouldn't have to do it tonight because he knew you were going to post this story, and this story offends Mr. Norris. Remember, don't ***k with Chuck.

[turbo96z28]

you got beat up by a girl :rofl:

[Ian]

and here I thought the saying was "dont f**k with AC Slater!" :lol:

[Tru2Chevy]

My woman kicked my ass last night

You probably deserved it....

- Justin

[11 Bravo]

I would press charges just on principle and see if she is treated the same way a guy would. Probably not.

[Dark_Knight7096]

Actually Ian, the saying really is don't f**k with screech.

[misterjuice]

did she kick you in the ballz?

[Brando56894]

Your woman didn't do anything. That lound bang she heard was a sonic boom from Chuck Norris' foot as he roundhouse kicked you in the face preemptively so he wouldn't have to do it tonight because he knew you were going to post this story, and this story offends Mr. Norris. Remember, don't ***k with Chuck.


:rofl: :rofl:

[WayFast84]

Owned?!

[Savage_Messiah]

:whip:

[Teds89IROC]

not ninjas; Chuck Norris is the one who doesn't sleep, he waits

~Ted

[Savage_Messiah]

ninjas > chuck

[Dark_Knight7096]

Ninjas > Chuck

Chuck, Vin Diesel, & Mr. T, well let's just say, first Mr. T pity's them because of what's about to happen, Chuck Norris then roundhouse kicks them into Vin's mouth, and Vin proceeds to eat their mortal souls and crap out nails and metal shards. That is all.

[Firebird67dude]

I would press charges just on principle and see if she is treated the same way a guy would. Probably not.

She would. Even if he dropped the cops legal have to arrest her. If theres a sign of injusry "his left eye" someone HAS to be arrested. Right out of my CJ book.

[Clutch Master]

i know it wasnt her, she was with me ;)

[12secondv6]

:rofl: Sniff sniff... I'm recovering now

[oh one ls1 SS]

:flower:

[Oddball]

So, as you all know, I am an angel.

Halo over my head all the time, I help old people cross the street, I help small fury animals when they are in need, I make brownies for my neighbors.

Well, yesterday I was tired (worked on the lawn the whol day w/ the woman) and I fell asleep around 10????

And.... genie was awake AFTER 10?!?!?! That alone is shocking and makes you wonder right?

Well, as I am peacefully sleeping and dreaming of world peace I dreamt that someone punched me on the left side of the face!

Little did I know, the woman decided to run from one side of the house, leap into the room, fly through the air, extend one fist and POW! She punched me in the face!

I woke up this morning and mentioned to her that my face hurts on the left side. Her side of the story is that she was watching tv and heard a big loud bang come from the bed room???? She claims I did it to myself??

She has not realized yet, I have ninja like reflexes and am always aware of my surroundings 24 hours a day.... even when sleeping.. cause we ALL know ninja's don't sleep!

So, now I look at my face in the mirror and I have a red mark under my left eye and it hurts!

Is there a phone # for battered boy friends????

Sounds like you and the little lady need to have a talk "Get your b*tch *ss back in the kitchen and make me some pie!"

[ar0ck]

Chuck Norris is a Ninja in the Octagon. Excellent ninja movie!

[Brando56894]

Sounds like you and the little lady need to have a talk "Get your b*tch *ss back in the kitchen and make me some pie!"

thatd be funny seeing genie as the abusive one in the relationship. that'd top it a firefighter that sets himself on fire and gets abused by his girlfriend whos like 6"s or so shorter then him :rofl:

[Savage_Messiah]

Yea, it would def. be Genie saying that to James....

[Tru2Chevy]

Yea, it would def. be Genie saying that to James....

:stupid:

- Justin

[12secondv6]

thatd be funny seeing genie as the abusive one in the relationship. that'd top it a firefighter that sets himself on fire and gets abused by his girlfriend whos like 6"s or so shorter then him :rofl:


:rofl: :rofl:

:scratch: Wait a minute..... she told me to get in the kitchen yesterday?!?!?!?!?!?!

[Brando56894]

what kinda pie are you makin her? i want some!

[ShitOnWheels]

Lol you guys are giving him WAAAAAAY too much attention!

[Tru2Chevy]

Whatsa matter George, jealous? :p

- Justin

[ShitOnWheels]

Whatsa matter George, jealous? :p

- Justin
HA! No, he gets enough attention from me when I'm home...that includes when I beat him up ;)

But you are all asking for more of these threads as time progresses, because he knows you'll give him attention ;)

For the record, I did NOT beat him up. I swear I was in the other room watching TV and heard a loud bang...asked if he was ok, all I got was a groggy "Ehggg." Sounded normal to me :) Woke up next morning, I tell him what happened, he tells me his dream and the eye still hurts, and I see a mark. While I do abuse him, I am not capable of leaving a mark ;)

[12secondv6]

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh boy, I'm getting a beating later! ;)

[Brando56894]

Whatsa matter George, jealous? :p

- Justin

:rofl: